Pink
by Hiding-Spiders
Summary: Lavender can see more than the average person. She just can't see what's going on in front of her face...


**13th Feb – in Common Room.**

Tut.

I've been watching Seamus and Dean have dungbomb fights for the last half an hour or so. Hermione looks like she's going to explode from the frustration.

Would serve her right.

Is that nasty? I don't really know. I've never liked Hermione. Me and Parvati, we really gave her a chance to be friends. But what does she do? Goes and throws it back in our faces, that's what.

Mind you, she's changed a bit. Matured.

Still don't quite understand the way her mind works.

She's lucky, though. She gets to hang around with Harry Potter and Ron Weasley all the time. Most people think Harry Potter's a complete nutcase.

I don't.

Parvati does. She reminds me every now and then: "I can't BELIEVE I went to the ball with him! Who does he think he is, saying he fought You-Know-Who?" I sot of nod and agree. Parvati doesn't like it if you disagree with her, and it's so much easier to avoid an argument rather than get into a big row over nothing.

Anyway. Here I am rambling about nothing in particular when I have some explaining to do. I'm Lavender Brown. I'm fifteen. Me and Parvati, who is my best friend if you hadn't guessed by now, bought these diaries and made a pact to write in them and then when we're older, show them to each other. Like at the end of the year, or something.

Who knows what'll happen by then?

Mind you, with what I just wrote about her, I don't think I'll be showing it to her any time soon.

What else can I write? It's kind of weird. I've done all of my homework. Usually I, like everyone else, leave it until the last possible moment. However with the workload ever increasing, I tend to do it all straight away and then I have time to muck about.

Parvati's sitting by the fire, scribbling away at her Potions essay. She borrowed mine. I hope she's not making it too obvious that she's copied.

It does bother me, a teeny weeny bit, that I let her walk all over me. She is so hard to disagree with. If you say something she doesn't like she gets this look on her face, like she's not at all impressed by you and she's giving you a warning to shut up before you go any further.

It's a bit weird if you ask me.

But no one asks me. I'm just Lavender. Hardly anyone knows the real me. Doesn't that sound dramatic? Like I'm in disguise or something.

Maybe I am. I don't know.

It seems that it used to be so important to me to fit in. To be the Plain Jane of Hogwarts. The girl that everyone knows, but doesn't really think about. If you saw me in a crowd, you wouldn't notice me. You'd notice Parvati, with her gorgeous good looks and smile that could knock all the boys out. Plus she's a twin. That's a talking point. When Parvati and Padma Patil walk into the Great Hall together, you can almost hear the boys thinking: "WOW."

I tag along behind them, like some plain boring person.

Which is what I am.

I'm not like Luna Lovegood. She's in the year below us, Ginny introduced me to her. She's a bit weird. You certainly sit up and pay attention to her.

I'm not like Ginny, either. Ginny's got that flaming red hair and sparkly eyes that makes everyone look at her.

I'm not like Hermione, with her loyalty and bookish-ness. I'm not like Seamus, with his cheeky Irish charm. I'm not like Dean, who is slightly mental and would dare to do anything. I'm not like Ron, tall, gangly but slightly cute Ron, always laughing and smiling. And I'm nothing – NOTHING – like Harry Potter.

Maybe my thing is that I'm plain.

Like, people look at me and think, "Oh, that's Lavender. Plain."

Do you know what I mean?

Well. Of course YOU don't. You're just a diary. But I know what I'm talking about.

Kind of.

Oh, I'm in a weird mood now.

I think there are other people like me at Hogwarts. Those people that you look at and think: I REALLY WILL NOT REMEMBER THEM. I notice them though. I see them in the common room. They don't look too bothered about being unrecognisable.

Why am I, then?

Maybe I should write about something else. Like Parvati. Parvati's written a huge list of all of her favourite things, from her favourite colour to her favourite lesson to her favourite sweets. Maybe I should, too.

My favourite colour is pink. People have a right laugh when I tell them that. They're like, "Not purple then, Lavender?" Hahaha. Like I haven't heard that joke many a time before.

But you know. It can't be helped.

I like pink. I'm not sure why. It's just a nice colour.

It's not because Parvati likes it. Everyone thinks I do what Parvati does, because sometimes I do. But sometimes, I don't.

I feel really proud when I don't. I feel like shouting: "LOOK, EVERYONE! I JUST DID SOMETHING INDEPENDENT!"

But I won't, because, that's just pathetic.

Parvati's making moon-eyes at Seamus. She's his latest crush. Before, it was always about that boy from Beauxbatons: "He's, like, so lush!" or, "I can't believe he said that ..." I can't even remember his name. Which is weird as I usually remember little details about everyone. It was some weird French name.

I'm not too good with languages.

I don't really know what to write now. Dean Thomas just smiled at me.

I'm not sure why that matters, but I felt like writing it.

I'm going to go. More soon.

Lavender

**14th Feb – At Breakfast**

It's a bit chaotic at the moment. I'm not sure why I decided to take my diary to breakfast. Maybe because it's Valentine's day, and I know there will be loads of activity this morning that I need to write about.

Not for me, but for other people, probably.

Take Parvati, for instance. She's received three cards already, and when she sat down at her usual place, there was a rose on a piece of parchment with her name on it. She squealed and then opened up her cards, loudly wondering who they were from. I looked at her little display with an expression of fake happiness on my face. To be honest, I feel a bit depressed about it.

I'm not the kind of girl that desperately craves a boyfriend. Not at all! I'm the kind of girl that despises those kind of girls. It's a bit odd that I'm best friends with Parvati, really.

I'm sorry. All I've done in this diary is moan about my best friend. Parvati's really lovely most of the time. She's chatty and bubbly and funny and loyal, and always cares for me. It's just sometimes she gets a bit too loud and girly and giggly for my liking.

Now she's looking at her cards with a happy look on her pretty face.

Why me?

It's a Saturday, and we're here at the time where there is the most students chattering in the Great Hall. There's no special decorations for Valentine's day, but owls keep bringing loads of cards and every now and then the more pretty girls receive a huge bunch of flowers.

It's quite depressing, really.

The boys are being extra loud and hyperactive. They're nothing compared to the first years, who run around screaming half of the time. But they're still pretty boisterous. There are just a couple of people that I can't spot that I usually see in the mornings. Dean Thomas is missing, and so is Harry Potter.

I wonder where they are.

I'm going to watch Ron, instead. His ears are bright red – meaning he's embarrassed about something. It's a Weasley thing. Or a Weasley man thing, because Ginny just blushes, like normal people.

Anyway. He's looking at Hermione who has a stunned expression on her face. She's staring at the table. I looked just now, and everyone else looked.

We're watching her. Everyone's gone kind of quiet. I wonder what will happen?

At Breakfast, Five Minutes Later 

Woah! That was odd.

I looked at Hermione, and then Parvati looked at me looking at Hermione, and then Padma looked a few seconds afterwards (must be a twin thing), and then Cho Chang and a bunch of Ravenclaws looked, and they stopped talking, and then Seamus looked around and noticed them not talking, so he looked and then he stopped talking, too. Everyone around him looked, and then people started to notice the quiet, so they became quiet. Pretty soon, every Gryffindor was looking at Hermione. And then every other house was, too. Even the teachers were looking, as though wondering what all the silence was about.

Hermione just stared. There was an envelope on the table. I took one look at the pink envelope and the scruffy "Hermione" written on it and I knew it was from Ron. It was easy to figure out. Even without looking at Ron, whose ears were so bright I thought they would burst into flames. I had an urge to throw my goblet of pumpkin juice over him to cool him down.

Hermione picked up the card. She was evidently going to tuck it away under her plate, but it was too late. There was a moment where no one knew what was going to happen, but there was a mutual understanding that something was.

I saw Colin Creevey with his mouth wide open. He had his camera half raised. Dennis was sitting next to him with the exact same expression on his face.

My eyes flickered from them to Parvati, who gave a glance at me with raised eyebrows and then looked at Hermione. The envelope had lifted from her hands and was revolving in the air. Suddenly the envelope came off and dropped to the table, right into Hermione's breakfast, and the card opened in mid-air. It sung in a squeaky voice:

"Happy Valentines Day, Hermione!  
This is a gift from me to you!  
I know it's unexpected to you  
But you must know the truth!  
  
I really like you, and it must be clear  
I act like a berk whenever you're near!  
So if you're willing, if you please  
Will you be the girl for me?"  
  
It then said, in a quieter voice, "Lovingly Constructed by Weasley's Wizard Wheezes!" before gently hovering into Hermione's outstretched hands.

Everyone was quiet for an incredibly long moment. I looked and saw Professor Sprout with her mouth wide open. Ron went a fascinating shade of green, which matched his red ears quite well. Then he stood up so quickly his chair went flying backwards and he ran from the room.

It was very quiet. Hermione had gone bright red. She looked as though she was about to burst into tears. Fred and George Weasley were grinning an identical, incredible grin. Everyone else was just staring.

Then eventually, people began to laugh. Then they started to talk. Hermione stood up and left the room, and then the noise level went right up as people began to chatter about what they had just witnessed.

That was a few minutes ago. Parvati just went to me, "Can you believe that?"

Well, yes. It's very obvious that Ron likes Hermione.

I whispered this to her and she giggled, her eyes wide and shining. "Well, yes, but can you believe that?"

I believe I just explained that.

Oh well. Dean just arrived in the hall looking all windswept. He sat down beside me, his cheeks a nice shade of pink. He smiled at me and said, "What have I missed?"

I was about to tell him when Parvati gabbled the whole story. Dean nodded slowly and looked at Seamus, who was grinning in a feeling-sorry-for-Ron way.

I just had a moment of extreme panic. Dean said to me, "What are you writing?"

I said, "It's – erm – kind of – a diary thing."

He grinned. "Can I read it?"

"NO!" I cried, more loudly then I had expected. Parvati rolled her eyes at me.

"Why'd you bring it to breakfast, anyway, Lav?"

I opened my mouth helplessly, unable to say what I was thinking. Dean looked at me in a weird way. I hope he's not annoyed that I yelled.

I don't know why I brought my diary into the hall. I just did. Is it a crime?

I didn't say this to Parvati, of course.

It's amazing that I actually managed to eat breakfast through all the writing that I've been doing but I have, so we're going to go.

More later.

Lavender

**Sunday 15th Feb – In Bed**

How annoying.

Parvati got a Valentine's card yesterday. She's so lucky! It was really pretty, too, it looked like it was hand drawn. It arrived in the middle of our dorm last night. The owl plopped the card on the floor and then flew out.

It said "To the One With The Beautiful Eyes" so I handed it to Parvati. She has the nicest brown eyes, ever, huge and chocolate and deep, and she knows it. She took it without question.

I really wish it was for me. It can't be, because my eyes are dull and normal.

Why does she get a secret admirer?

Why?

I'm watching her now. She's getting ready for breakfast. I'm not going. I asked her to bring me some toast; I don't think she will. She's jabbering on about how I have to go to breakfast because she needs help in finding out whether people are looking suspicious because "You always watch people and they won't find it odd, and I need to see who sent me that card."

I told her that I am not in the mood for breakfast yet, and I might be down later. She walked out looking annoyed with me. Oh well.

I have just had a nice daydream about the Valentine's card being for me, and then I went on a hunt to find out who sent it to me. I looked everywhere, up, down, left, right, and then I realised.

I didn't know who I wanted to send it to me.

I was deciding between Ron, Harry, Neville, Dean and Seamus when I realised it was pointless.

And now I'm writing. Again.

Parvati's not writing in hers at all. It was her idea in the first place. She just writes things like "Owls Received: 3. Kisses received: 0. Hugs received: 4 (Seamus twice, Jake once, Hannah once). Compliments: 34." That kind of thing.

I think it's a bit sad, myself.

Maybe that's mean.

I don't know.

More later.  
  
Lavender

**Sunday 15th Feb – Again!**

Pav forgot the toast. Typical. She also said she has no clue who may have sent the card, except it might be Seamus.

And then Seamus said, "Pav, did you get my card?" so it was him that sent it.

I still was hoping it was for me, even though I knew it wasn't.

**Monday 16th Feb – Common Room**

We're in Divination. I don't get why Ron and Harry and all those other idiots laugh at this subject. I think it's kind of cool, and I have a talent for it. Parvati thinks she does, but it's just because she spends hours swotting up for it. I just get it, like that.

That sounds really big headed, doesn't it? Professor Trelawny told me on the night of our exam in our fourth year that I have a flair for the subject, and although "my friend Parvati" is very good, I have a flow that she doesn't.

I didn't tell her this, because it's just ... mean. And pathetic.

But still, I'm quite happy about it, in a weird way.

Maybe I am a bad best friend.

**Later**

Sorry I stopped writing. Seamus came over and asked me if I had any colouring pencils or something, because Dean used all of his up the other day. I said, no.

I was about to say, "So how did you make that card, then?" but then I realised that Dean must have drawn it.

Obviously, as Seamus isn't the slightest bit artistic.

I'm not going to tell Parvati this, as she would probably be heartbroken. She's decided that Seamus is perfect: sensitive, artistic, lovely, funny, with a bit of cheekiness, too. Along with being cute and gorgeous, only she said this before everything else.

It's all a bit shallow if you ask me.

That's another thing I won't be telling Parvati.

My God. I hardly tell her anything.

Isn't that weird?

Hermione and Ron are arguing. Again. They haven't been talking to each other since the Valentine's Day Fiasco. All the Gryffindor's are looking out to see what happens next between them.

It's blatantly obvious what's going on. Hermione likes Ron, Ron likes Hermione. They've grown so close but didn't say anything in hope that their feelings would fade. But instead they grew stronger, to maybe even love.  
  
They're just too shy to admit it.

**Monday 16th Feb – Almost In Bed**

Sorry for the sudden stop again. My diary entries aren't very long, are they? Compared to my first few. I'm going to write more tomorrow, but I can't tonight because Parvati's wants us to blow out the candles.

I wish that we had normal lamps at Hogwarts. Candles are a pain.

But anyway. I'm just letting you know that Dean probably likes Parvati. Parvati found a card under her pillow, a cheesy, cutesy Valentine's, with Seamus' name scrawled along the bottom. Parvati wondered aloud who this mystery person could be that sent her the other card. I knew: it was Dean.

I didn't tell her for a while. I'm not sure why. I think it's because I knew something that she desperately wanted to know. Well. To be honest, I know lots of things about people that Parvati doesn't know. She can't read between the lines, can't understand what looks from people or comments between a boy and a girl mean.

I can.

Anyway. Eventually I said:

"Pav. Who in our year is really good at art?"

She said, "I dunno! Dean?"

Me: "Yes. Who has been talking to you recently?"

Pav: "Dean ..."

Me: "And finally. Who, just who, is daring enough to send this card, but romantic and creative enough to leave it unsigned?"

Pav: "DEAN!"

And that's basically how the whole night has been. She's been prancing around shouting about Dean, about how he loves her, etc.

Hermione just walked into the dorm. She listened to Parvati jabber about Dean and Seamus for a bit, then rolled her eyes and pulled her drapes shut.

We heard her mutter something, and saw a spell being worked. She does that. I think it's a spell to block out our noise.

I feel a bit guilty about it.

Oh well. I'll be fine.

I feel a bit depressed.

I'm sure I'll cheer up. More tomorrow.  
  
This was quite long, wasn't it?  
  
Sorry. Going now.  
  
Lavender

**Tuesday 17th – Great Hall**

I'm becoming obsessed with my diary. It's lunch time and I've just finished eating.

I'm just writing to say this:

RON AND HERMIONE ARE OFFICIALLY A COUPLE.

It took them long enough. But it's nice.

I just smiled at them. I've known for years that they liked each other. It's nice that they're together. Like they're characters in a personal book that only I've read, and I just read the ending: they lived happily ever after.

Parvati's really, really annoying me about Dean. I've never disliked her this much before. All she goes on about is what to do, what to do, who to ask out.

I feel like slapping her.

Later.

Lavender

**Thursday 19th February – common room**

Sorry I didn't write for long. We're in the common room now. I just finished all of my homework. We were overloaded yesterday so I couldn't find the time to write. Teachers!

Parvati's really, really, really getting very far on the annoying-me scale. We just had a kind of snappish argument thing. I'm sitting by the window, writing, and she's curled up by the fireplace.

I like writing by the window. You can see the stars and the moon reflected in the lake, and the Whomping Willow on the grounds. It's pretty. I like sitting here when the sun sets, too.

Anyway. This argument. Argh!

We got into the common room a while ago and we sat at our usual homework table. There was a magical jewellery catalogue open on the table. Parvati, being Parvati, grabbed it and looked. I had forgotten being annoyed with her and was just swooning over a GORGEOUS necklace, a petite silver star charm on a thin chain with a pink stone in the middle, when she had to go and ruin it.

"Do you think someone left this here as a hint?" she gabbled excitedly.

I was just going to open my mouth to let out a disbelieving reply when something distracted us. At her words, there were manic footsteps, a loud wailing sound and then a cry of "argh!" as Seamus, who had apparently tried to run up the staircase to the girl's dormitories (which happened to be right by our usual table) crashed into the door which swung open to reveal him lying there looking completely stunned, with a red face in embarrassment and shock as we realised he had been eavesdropping on our conversation.

There was a long moment where we both stared at him, and he stared at us. Then he got up and ran out into the boy's dormitories.

I looked at Parvati, not knowing whether to burst into tears or burst out laughing. Then she said, "OH MY GOD, THAT SOLVES IT!"

"Solves what?" I said, managing not to laugh or cry.

"Solves why the catalogue was here. Can't you see? He was trying to overhear me! To see which piece of jewellery I like best!"

I stared, flabbergasted, as she rambled on apparently not noticing how big headed she sounded. I managed to stop my anger by concentrating on my essay. I didn't speak until it was done. Then I looked up at the sound of a shout.

Dean had just scrambled through the portrait hole, looking all dishevelled and tired. And then he was moaning at Seamus.

All I heard was "You idiot! I can't believe you!" and then Seamus shouting back sounding all shouty and Irish. Shouty and Irish? I must be tired. I'm talking like ... not me.

There I go again.

Anyway.

When they had gone, Parvati turned to me and went, "Can't you see? They're fighting – OVER ME!"

And then she moaned about it.

That was it. I snapped. I looked up and said, "Look, Parvati. I am so, so sorry that your life is so full of trauma. It must be _devastating_ for two cute boys to be completely and utterly in love with you, and eavesdropping on our conversations to see what type of jewellery you'd like. But I honestly do not have much sympathy left with you. How do you think I feel? Do you think anyone's ever going to like me? Plain, boring Lavender? Is that how you see me? Is that how everyone sees me? Does anyone bother to think that there might be more to me than that?"

And Parvati stomped out of the room.

I looked over, exasperated, to where Dean and Neville were sitting, their mouths wide open. I scowled, tutted and got up, and sat at the window, looking out at the stars and singing a song under my breath, a silly little song about everything being pink.

And then Parvati came down, picked up a piece of parchment she had left on the table and glared at me as she stomped back up the stairs.

Well, I'm not going to beg her for forgiveness, if that's what she wants.

I'm going to go to bed.

Goodnight.

Lavender

**Friday 20th Feb – Dormitory**

Oh God. What have I done? I miss Pav. I'm going to apologize as soon as she wakes up.

Later 

All is well now. I sort of realised that, despite my pain, it really isn't Parvati's fault that all the boys think that she's gorgeous. And even though she was going on about it, she still is my best friend.

I'm going to write more later, because we're going to breakfast.

See ya soon!

Lavender

**Friday 20th Feb – In Dormitory, panicking**

You may have noticed that I am writing this on paper, because I simply cannot break my diary writing addiction.

AND MY DIARY HAS GONE MISSING.

OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD.

I left it right there on my bed, under my pillow! It was fine there! It was completely fine!

No one would have touched it!

I asked Parvati and she said she hadn't seen it. I asked Hermione. I asked everyone. No one in the dormitory has seen it.

So I went around in the common room looking for it. Harry Potter gave me the name of a house elf that is good at finding things and likes to clean Gryffindor Tower, Knobbly or Hobby or something. But I told him that I had looked everywhere and it wasn't there.

I asked Dean, I asked Neville, I asked Harry, I asked Fred and George, I asked Ron, I ASKED EVERYONE AND NO ONE HAD SEEN IT.

I was practically crying by this point. Who could have been reading my diary? ANYONE, THAT'S WHO!

Oh my God. They would know how I feel about everything, about Parvati, about Dean ...

Oh, my GOD. GOD. GOD.

I don't know what I'm going to do.

Later 

Still no sign of the diary. I posted a message on the notice board saying: "WANTED: Diary. Is small and pink with a silver flower on the front. If you find it, DO NOT READ IT OR I WILL HEX YOU. Leave it on the table nearest to the door of the girls dormitory."

I also asked Hermione if it was physically possible to hex an object so that no one else but you could touch it whilst not knowing where the object was. Hermione went on a full on speech about it. In my hysterical-ness, I just nodded and agreed desperately, saying "Yes, of course", and "absolutely".

I have no idea what I'm going to do.

Or what Hermione was saying.

I just read over what I wrote earlier.

What did I mean, what I feel about Dean?

I'm usually good at deciphering other people's feelings but mine seem a complete mystery to me at the moment. Do I like Dean? Is that why I'm so annoyed at Parvati?

This startling thought occurred to me just as I looked around and saw Parvati with her arm around Dean.

Oh, my God.

This day is going from bad to worse.

**Saturday 21st Feb – in common room again.**

It's really chucking it down and everyone seems quite mopey and depressed about it. I still can't find my diary. On top of my despair about that, I'm also feeling really annoyed and frustrated about Dean. I have realised that all of the thoughts I have about him, that I don't write about in my diary, such as "He looks cute when his hair flops in his face", might be there because I fancy him.

Because of this, and the fact that Parvati doesn't know that I like him and is all over both Dean AND Seamus, I feel like bursting into tears constantly.

I keep looking wistfully at Hermione and Ron. They're holding hands, like some holding-hand people. They look so happy, playing with each others fingers and laughing and looking into each others eyes, before leaning over and sharing a gentle kiss. Ron has his arms around Hermione now.

She never usually lets him do that.

I guess the world is just out to get me at the moment.

Lavender

**Later**

Just realised who I haven't asked about my diary yet: Seamus.

I went up to Dean and said, "Have you seen Seamus?" He looked confused for the smallest moment (which was really cute) and then said, "No, he's out."

"Where?" I asked.

"He's doing some thing with Harry."

So I'm waiting for them to come back now.

Aha! There he is. He's in the doorway, looking at some piece of paper with Harry.

I'm going to ask him.

**Even Later**

Grr, grr, grr. Seamus has not seen my diary and is looking annoyingly secretive about this piece of paper that he and Harry are clutching onto. Must be some secret thing for Parvati. Probably, anyway.

I'm going to bed.

I'm just fed up now.

Lavender

**Monday 23rd Feb – In Charms**

Professor Flitwick's ill. This is a rare occurrence, as he has never, ever been ill while he's been teaching us at Hogwarts.

I'm a bit worried, because I really like Professor Flitwick.

But we've got a supply which means I can write on my little scraps of paper. I'm getting annoyed about my diary now.

Plus I really think Dean likes Parvati. Right now he's in deep conversation with her.

I think everyone's forgotten me. Yet again.

Lavender

**Later**

OH, MY GOD. MY DIARY IS BACK.

I'm not sure who took it, but it IS BACK! We came up after dinner and saw it there, sitting there looking all innocent and diary-ish.

Must start speaking properly again.

Anyway. I was like "OH MY GOD!" I don't know who took it, which is really annoying, but I have it back.

I'm not letting it out of my sight from now on.

I stuck the bits of paper that I was writing on into this diary. Now everything's good.

It's funny; everyone's really overloaded with work, stress and tension except me. Well I have stress and tension, but I've done practically all of my work. I think it's because I am sadder than everyone else, and have more spare time where everyone else is flirting and cuddling and kissing to do my homework. The only other person other than me that has finished all of their work is, of course, Hermione. Ron and Harry look in it possibly worse than anyone else.

But Ron has Hermione, at least.

Anyway. You must think I'm going mad. I think I am. Parvati's copying my Puffskein drawings for Care of Magical Creatures, while I watch everyone. Seamus isn't around again. Dean's scribbling on a piece of paper, rumpling up his hair.

I wonder what he's writing.

Seamus just staggered through the portrait hole looking tired. As Dean got up to talk to him, I don't really know what came over me, but I just walked over to his table to see what he had been writing.

"To the Girl with the Beautiful Eyes, meet me at the bottom of the stairs tomorrow night. From Your Secret Admirer xxx"

I stared for a very long moment. This confirmed things that I did not want to be confirmed: that Dean is Parvati's secret admirer, that he really does like her, and that he really is romantic and creative.

I was getting over the shock when Fred and George descended on me.

"Hello, Lavender! Reading other people's personal belongings, are you?"

"You should be ashamed. You had your diary stolen, didn't you? Don't you know how it feels to have your privacy invaded?"

"Did you ever get it back?"

"Yes – "I began, but they both grinned.

"That's good. That's very good."

"Incredibly –"

"One hundred percent –"

"Good." They chorused, clapping their hands together at the exact same time. I blinked. They really do scare me sometimes.

"Did you take my diary?" I asked suspiciously.

"Us? Oh, no ... you can use a truth potion if you like ..."

"Yeah, we're working on a temporary truth sweet. Lasts for three minutes. We've been testing it, you see."

"Oh ... right." I said.

"It's very clever. And we plan to expand on truth potion, harmless but effective, that you can slip into people's food and drinks ... just as a little joke."

"You could really hurt people's feelings, you know." I warned them carefully.

They looked at me and laughed.

"Nah. We'll make sure we don't. See ya later, Lav."

And they walked off.

I really do wonder about the pair of them sometimes.

Anyway. Dean likes Parvati and is going to meet her on Wednesday. What am I going to do?

For a moment I thought of hiding the note, but then I realised that was pointless – he could just write another one. I thought of hovering around and pretending to "accidentally" read it and offer to give it to her personally, but then I decided against that, too. I just sloped off feeling disappointed.

I decided not to tell Parvati. I mean, she's going to find out anyway, isn't she?

Oh yeah, another thing. Dean seems really annoyed at Seamus, for apparently getting detention for wandering around the corridors in the middle of the night. I wonder what that's about?

(Oh my GOD. I just re read that paragraph. How pathetic is that? I never used to be that sad. I should stop worrying about Dean's business – and other people's business in general – and stick to my own. Except, of course, I don't have enough going on in my business to stick to it. If you see what I mean. Oh, my God, I'm going mad. I sound like Parvati).

Going to sleep.

Parvati

**Tuesday 24th Feb – in Common Room**

Cannot believe I signed off last night as "Parvati". I'm going mad.

I'm Lavender still.

I think!

Anyway. Writing to say that I can't write much. I'm overloaded with work. I can't believe how far behind I am. Must have been caught up in my obsession with Dean.

I just realised something. No one but me is going to read this anyway. So why am I worrying about it?

I'm going mad, completely mad.

Lavender

**Wednesday 25th Feb – Charms**

Professor Flitwick is better again and I got an "O" on my last Divination essay, which we got back last lesson.

We're doing charms that make people speak loudly which makes it almost impossible to be seen or heard writing in a diary over the din. I'll practise in a minute.

I just have to say: I really, really do hate feeling like this.

Parvati hasn't said anything about meeting Dean, which is weird. At first I thought it might be to spare my feelings because I like him, but then I realised that she doesn't know that I like him.

Maybe I should tell her?

Nah. Will cause too much trouble.

More later.

Lavender

Later 

It's lunch time now, and we're in the library. I just finished making notes for my racoon transfiguration essay. Parvati's copying me. Again.

I'm not too bothered. I'm not bothered much about anything at the moment except Dean. He's not here at the moment, which is good in a way because I really do make an idiot out of myself by staring at him constantly whenever he's near me.

I'm not making it that obvious, am I?

I should stop being so sarcastic. It's not even funny.

Lavender

Later, again 

We've had dinner now and we're sitting in the common room.

Nothing's happening. With Parvati and Dean, I mean. Parvati hasn't said anything about the note, and neither has Dean.

Maybe he didn't send it?

I don't know what to do with myself.

Later 

I've been waiting all night to see what's going on with Dean and Parvati. I've even gone as far as asking Parvati if she has had any notes lately. She just looked at me weirdly and asked if I was feeling okay. Then she said that she hadn't.

That's IT!

I'M NOT WAITING UP FOR A BOY ANY LONGER!

AND THAT'S FINAL!

Lavender

Three minutes later 

I'm just going to stay and finish off my raccoon essay. I mean, it's not due in until next Thursday, but it's always good to be on top of things.

I'm in denial, aren't I?

Oh, my God. I'm going mad.

Lavender

Later still  
  
We're going to bed.  
  
Obviously nothing's going to happen, then.  
  
So tonight was a complete waste.  
  
Ah well, I have a really good essay about Transfiguring raccoons, though.  
  
Lavender   
  
**Thursday 26th Feb – In Common Room**

I really hate my life at the moment.

I really, really, really, really, really, really, really do.

Why? I'm a lucky girl and I know it.

But I look over at Parvati and Dean, both in deep conversation with each other, gazing lovingly into each other's eyes, and then all of those positive thoughts that I've been thinking don't matter to me anymore.

I seriously feel like my world is falling down. Like, despite the fact that I only just realised I liked Dean, the thought of him with anyone else makes me so upset, angry and sorrowful that I just want to sit here in the middle of the room and scream, cry and wail at the same time.

I can't stand this feeling. I hate my own best friend because she's so pretty. I hate Dean because he likes her. And yet I want them both to be happy.

I really, really, really, really hate feeling this way.

I'm going to bed, I can't stand it anymore.

Lavender

Friday 27th Feb – Common Room (again) 

Something really weird has just happened to me.

I was sitting there on the verge of tears, desperately craving something to cuddle, when Parvati came in.

"I just talked to Dean –"she said.

But before she could finish her sentence, I burst into tears. I couldn't help it. They were spilling down my cheeks before I could stop them, wave after wave of salty tears. I laid back on my bed, howling miserably in total and utter teenager-in-love despair, with Parvati staring at me looking very surprised.

"Lav – what? –"

I sat up and she gave me really nice, long, best friend hug. And then she got a tissue and let me wipe my face, and then got one of her make up removing wipes and removed all of my eye make up. I sat there feeling embarrassed but relieved, when Parvati sat down and said, "Out with it."

"What?" I said, though I knew what.

"Why were you crying?"

I thought of lying. And then I realised.

She's Parvati. I can tell her anything.

So I told her everything, about how I was jealous, about not realising really why until I found out that I liked Dean. About how madly in love with him I am, and that I know that Dean likes her, but I feel really bad for feeling upset and that she can go out with him if she really does want to.

For some reason, Parvati just smiled a gentle smile. I was already in my nightie so she moved me backwards and pulled my blankets out. I clambered in bed feeling completely confused. She simply said, "Get some sleep", poured me a glass of cold water and then blew out all the candles.

I was going to say something but then felt really overwhelmed with tiredness. Maybe being in love makes you lose energy because I was suddenly out of it. I laid back, and then Parvati tucked me in and gave me a cuddle.

"Don't worry. I'll sort everything out."

I worried about this for a bit and then realised there wasn't a lot of point. I let myself fall asleep, dreaming of Dean.

I woke up just now. It's four o'clock in the morning and the entire common room is empty and silent. I'm sitting by the fire, as it's too cold to sit by the window. I wish I had thought of bringing my dressing gown. I just really needed to write.

I've been here for ages. I'm not in the slightest bit tired, because I went to bed so early.

Someone's coming.

Oh my GOD. It's him! It's Dean!

More later!

Lavender

Later 

I have never been so confused in my life.

Dean saw me, and I saw him, and we looked at each other and said, "What're you doing up?" quietly at the same time as he approached.

He said "You first" so I said, "Couldn't sleep." He smiled and said the same. We sat there for a long moment in front of the fire, being quiet. And then we had a little conversation.  
  
It was going pretty well when suddenly he said, "Did you have a good Valentine's day?"  
  
I found that really odd as Valentine's Day was ages ago. I was about to say "Yeah, it was okay," when I realised that if I ever wanted him to think of me as someone other than plain, boring Lavender I would tell the truth. So I said, "No, not really. It was boring."

He looked a bit surprised. "Didn't you get any cards?"

"No," I said, slowly. "Parvati got loads, though. I spent most of the day with her trying to figure out who sent them."

We both went to say something at the same time. I don't know what he was going to say.

Then I said, "You sent Parvati a card, didn't you?"

He looked nonplussed.

"What? No!" he said, looking half amused and half confused.

"... oh ... we thought it was you."

"What was me?"

"The card. It was arty and pretty, all pink. We thought – because you draw, and it was really pretty and nice – well – never mind. It wasn't you."

"Yes it was." He said.

I stared at him.

"But –"I said, completely confused, "You just said –"

Just then, stupid, annoying, irritating, STUPID Seamus wandered down the stairs.

"What – oh." He said. "Sorry. I didn't think anyone would be down here. I need to do my Potions essay."

"What?" I said. "What's the time?"

Dean looked at his watch and said, "It's half six."

I can't believe it. It seemed like five minutes ago that I had stumbled out of bed.

Dean gave a really long, annoyed look at Seamus before saying, "I'd better go," to me. He smiled, and then gave me a really weird look before walking off.  
  
I was wide-awake earlier but suddenly I feel really tired.

REALLY tired!  
  
I'm going to bed for a bit.  
  
Lavender

**Later**

**  
**I woke up at about one o clock to find a note on the end of my bed. It said:

_Lav – don't worry about lessons, I've told the teachers that you've gone half mad with stress and have flung yourself into the lake. (Only joking) I really said that you were so stressed and overloaded with work that you fell asleep and I didn't have the heart to wake you up and I think you needed the rest. I checked on you during break and you were still asleep. I hope you're all right.  
  
Speak to you later,  
  
Luv Pav xxx_

I was just wondering whether to skive the whole day when Parvati skipped in holding a parcel of food: chicken, salad and cheese sandwiches, a great big bar of Honeyduke's chocolate (don't ask where she got that from), and a bottle of Butterbeer.

I kind of like being waited on hand and foot.

We both had some Butterbeer and I ate my rolls, and we were snapping off and eating bits of chocolate and talking about what Dean had said. I hadn't thought about it since I had fallen asleep. It was really, really nice, being next to Parvati with the sun shining through the window, in my nightie with the day off while everyone else was having to work.

That sounds mean, but it's just how I felt.

Anyway. Parvati grinned at me when I finished the story and said, "It's a bit obvious, Lav, that he wrote that card for you."

I spat out a mouthful of Butterbeer over my bed, but ignored it. I stared at her.

"Why would he do that?"

She looked at me as though I were stupid.

"Because, silly," she said, biting off another piece of chocolate, "He really likes you." And she popped a piece of chocolate in her mouth in a satisfied sort of way, raising her eyebrows at the surprised look on my face.

I was going to get up and go to my next lesson but she pushed me down. She said that we had double Charms, and that Professor Flitwick, being a softie, would not mind in the slightest. Then she hugged me and told me to eat the rest of the chocolate and drink up the Butterbeer and stop writing "in that bloody diary". Then she skipped off.

I heard her outside the door. She said "Oh – Dean! How did you – oh? Really? Is that possible? Oh. Sorry. Yeah, she's in there –"

Panicking, I wiped the chocolate and Butterbeer traces from my mouth and was just clambering into bed when there was a knock on the door.

"Come in!" I said, once I was under the covers.

Dean came in. I tried to act surprised but he laughed. "Don't be silly, I know you heard me, you can hear everything in the dorm corridors."

I laughed despite my embarrassment and he sat on the end of my bed.

"Look," he began, "Is that Butterbeer?"

I blinked and then realised what he said. "Oh, yeah, sure. Have some if you want."

He gladly took a glass and then said, "Sorry, I didn't mean to be rude. Anyway. Is that Honeyduke's chocolate? Do all girls have feasts hidden in their dorms?"

I laughed and offered him a piece. He munched on it and I took the opportunity to ask him how he had gotten up the girl's staircase, which turns into a giant stone slide whenever a boy steps onto it. He laughed and said he had borrowed Harry's Firebolt, flown up the stairs and then stepped on the stairs so that they turned into a slide and pushed the Firebolt down it, because "Harry is really protective of that broom".

I smiled through his story and then, finally, he said, "So I suppose you're wondering why I'm here."

"Yes!" I said, maybe a bit too soon. He smiled at me.

"I just wanted to say – I really need to talk to you. Charms started about ten minutes ago so I can't really stay. But – can you meet me at the bottom of the girl's dormitory staircase, tonight at seven?"

I nodded, barely aware of what I was doing as I stood up and followed him to the door. We had an awkward but sweet "Erm – well – see you soon," moment. He looked down at me, looked into my eyes and grinned before walking off.

I looked down, wondering what was so odd. Then he shouted, "Like your nightie!" before laughing slightly and running off down the corridor. I looked down and realised: I was wearing a very short pink nightie with a teddy bear on it.

Despite this, I smiled. I closed the door, hugged myself and flopped down onto the bed. Then I drunk all of the Butterbeer, ate all of the chocolate, and have been writing ever since.

Now I'm going to lie here and daydream until the time rolls around where I can see Parvati and let her help me decide on which outfit to wear tonight.

Maybe Dean likes me and not her.

This makes me happy.

Lavender

Later 

I have had the weirdest night.

I found Dean at the bottom of the stairs. I decided, eventually, to wear jeans and a pink strappy top. Parvati wanted to put my hair up but I wanted it down, so she contented herself by doing my make up. I cleaned my mess in the dorm and then went downstairs.

For a moment, I felt like I was going to fling myself into Dean's arms, as he looked so cute in his jeans and t-shirt with his robes over the top. He smiled at me, linked my arm into his and then led me off.

"Where are we going?" I asked, giggling slightly, after a while of wandering around.

"You'll see." He said. We seemed to be going up a large amount of stairs. Eventually, however, we snuck up a set of stairs to the roof.

The top of Hogwarts is amazing. You can see the whole place, the lake, the stars, the moon, the Whomping Willow, everything I like to watch out of my window. I gasped as I spotted the table, set for two, with all the food set out and Seamus as our "Waiter", candles lighting up the table and a bunch of very pretty pink flowers in a vase in the middle.

Seamus bowed to us and flashed us a cheeky grin. I smiled at him, thinking that Parvati would have liked that grin, and making a mental note to tell her about it later. Then Dean looked into my eyes and Seamus served our food and slipped off somewhere. It turned out to be, surprisingly, all dessert.

"We've already had dinner," he said, "And I know Parvati got you a load of food, so I thought we might as well eat some dessert."

I grinned at him. It was all my favourites: ice cream, cake, chocolate, sweets ... an amazingly endless supply of treats. We ate for a bit, admiring the view. I couldn't believe how lucky I was.

"This is so nice," I said eventually. "I mean – all this trouble for me – I –"I suddenly couldn't get the words out.

Dean smiled.

"The flowers are for you, by the way." He said, pointing. "I know you like pink."

I was just about to ask how he knew that when he said something that stopped me.

"Lavender, that card on Valentine's Day ... it was for you."

I couldn't believe it. Well, I could, because I suspected it was ever since we had had that little chat in the middle of the night (well, the morning) the other day. But still. It was nice to hear him say it, and surprising, too.

"But," I said, "You said "for the girl with the beautiful eyes"."

"Yes." Said Dean.

"I – I don't have beautiful eyes, my eyes are just like everyone else's eyes. That's why I gave it to Parvati. She's got perfect eyes."

"Your eyes," Dean said, gazing into them as he spoke. "Are perfect to me."

And then he blushed, something that I've never seen him do before. I smiled and blushed, too. Then he said, "I said that because your eyes are really pretty. But also, because you see with them."

"What?" I said, confused.

"You notice things. You watch people. I've seen you; it's like you're one step ahead of everyone else. Like you can read between the lines and see the subtlety. It's one of the reasons why I like you so much."

I stared in shock. Hearing all of these lovely flattering things about myself was wonderful, but it was also surprising. I couldn't believe I was hearing them from Dean.

"I really thought you liked Parvati," I said sheepishly, after a while. "I really, really did."

Dean smiled.

He ate a sweet from his plate and then cleared his throat. "I really, really like you, Lavender." He said. He held my hands over the table, which was really nice. "I really do. You – sitting there – you're so gorgeous and lovely – and I can't stand it. I love it and it's driving me mad because I love it so much. I've liked you for ages, and Seamus persuaded me to tell you. We had a pact. He'd send a card to Parvati and I'd send one to you. He just got one of those cheap ones and signed it, but I decided to make one. I sent it to you. I was going to but my name, but I chickened out at the last minute. I put "From Your Secret Admirer". Then I spent ages wondering why I'd done it. I got Seamus to spy on you to see some of the things that you like. I wanted to ask you out, because you hadn't said anything about the card and I was worried that you might have thought it was something else. Then Seamus told me something he had overheard and then you shouted about Parvati having two boys that were in love with her. I realised what you must have thought. I kept trying to explain but I just couldn't. I almost told you when Seamus came down. He realised that I wasn't in bed and made up some rubbish about needing to do a Potions essay. Then he reminded me that the day I told you all this had to be perfect, just like I wanted it to be, and that I shouldn't rush it. The truth is, Lavender, I love you – I really do. Even when you wore that nightie you looked so cute. I need you. So will you go out with me?"

I was near tears by this point. Forget that, they were already welling up in my "perfect" eyes. I looked at the sweet wrappers on the table and a little suspicion formed in my mind, but I didn't say anything. I just leant over the table and kissed him.

We kissed for a very long time, savouring the moment, the feel of being with each other. And then I stopped it. I sat back in my seat, smiled and said "Yes."

Then we got up from the table and stood there, again admiring the view, with Dean's arms wrapped around me. He kept kissing me, on the cheek, forehead and chin, again and again and again. I felt like I was going to cry again, from overwhelming happiness.

We were really calm and peaceful when Seamus burst up. He blurted, "Someone's coming!" Panicked, Dean turned to the table, grabbed the flowers and a piece of parchment along with something else small that I didn't see. Then he turned to the table and said, "Evanesco!" and the whole lot disappeared.

Dean gave me a quick kiss and then walked over to the edge of the castle. "We're going to have to fly to Gryffindor tower. Will you be alright?"

I nodded. Seamus got on his broom and waited for us. Dean got on and I got on behind him, feeling strange, still not used to the feeling of sitting on a cushion when there was no cushion there. I wrapped my arms around Dean and leant against him, letting out a little shriek as he swooped off into the air.

It took a while to get there and I was terrified. I clung on, keeping my eyes tightly shut. After a while I got used to the feeling and opened my eyes. For a split second it was incredibly beautiful, seeing everything rush past in a blur and being so close to Dean, who I loved. But I couldn't watch for too long, because I felt like I was going to be sick. I shut my eyes again and clutched Dean tighter.

We swooped through a window in Gryffindor tower. It had apparently gotten really late, because hardly anyone was there. I clambered off of the broom looking and feeling windswept. Dean turned to me, his cheeks pink, hair tousled, eyes sparkling, and I just wanted to grab him and kiss him until all my adrenaline and excitement had worn down. Instead I grabbed his hand and led him to the corridor outside the girl's dormitories.

He held my hands for a second as we both caught our breath. Then I leant up and kissed him.

"I can't believe you'd do this for me." I whispered, very close to him.

"It's because I love you." He said. He kissed me again and I felt like I was going to cry with happiness once more.

"I love you too," I whispered.

And that's what happened. I told Parvati everything – Hermione actually listened this time, and smiled at the end. I think having a boyfriend has made her appreciate what I'm feeling.

Just the thought of Dean made me squeal and I wrapped my arms around myself and flopped onto the bed again. Now I'm writing.

I think I'll sleep now.

More soon!

Lavender

**Saturday 7th Feb – in Common Room.**

I am so sorry that I didn't write sooner. It's been really hectic. I promise now that I'm going out with Dean, I will not, and I really mean this, neglect my diary entries.

Before I get into that. It was my birthday on Wednesday. Dean got me a very cute pink fluffy cuddly bear ("Finally!" I shouted, when I opened it, "Something to cuddle when I'm not with you!"), and a small box. I opened it to find a little silver star charm on a thin chain with a pink jewel set in the middle. I smiled as he clipped it around my neck.

Suddenly I realised something. The moonlight – the pink flowers – these were things that I hadn't mentioned to anyone –

Except my diary.

I said, "Hold on a minute. Did you steal my diary?"

It turns out that Dean did not steal my diary, but simply asked Seamus to find out things about me, and Seamus had stolen my diary. I looked for Seamus everywhere to slap him and found him kissing Parvati in our dormitory, a broom lying on the floor.

I smiled at them and snuck out, not having the heart to slap him then. I went back downstairs and spent some time by myself with Dean, enjoying the things that my family had sent me, and the presents that Parvati had gotten me.

I did talk to Fred and George about giving Dean truth sweets. Apparently Seamus found out about them, and had decided it would be better if he gave Dean some, but not me. I didn't complain. I did, however, tell Dean, because I felt like I should tell him everything. Thankfully he laughed madly when he found out, which was good.

I've been reading my old diary entries and I've realised how much I've changed. I'm no longer the plain, boring Lavender that no one understands; I'm the plain, boring, happy Lavender that a few people really do understand.

And I like it.

I have also realised that, a few weeks ago, I wrote a diary entry wondering what would happen by the end of the year.

It's amazing that all of this has happened in a few weeks.

I think that when you keep a diary, you pick up on even more things that you didn't notice, and your life suddenly seems a lot busier than before.

Dean just came up to me, smiling, and said, "Still writing in that book?"

I grinned. "Yes."

He smiled at me and kissed me. "When you're done, come and have a cuddle."

I know I said I wouldn't neglect my diary.

But he's there, and I'm here, and I think I know what I have to do.

Lavender


End file.
